Tips for Building Rapport
“It is one of the most beautiful
compensations of this life that no man can sincerely try
to help another without helping himself” Ralph
Waldo Emerson.
Rapport is a vital skill on which success of business and
relationships are fundamentally dependant on. The rapport
you have with people will determine the lasting nature of
the relationship. It enables a relationship to be built
with trust and understanding. The feeling, often called
empathy is an essential ingredient in all successful communication.
What do you do if you want to have a conversation with someone?
We first need to get in rapport with this
person. Rapport will allow us to connect with the person.
By getting into rapport first it allows us to take time
to understand the other person’s point of view and
what they feel about a particular situation. What do you
do when you need to have a difficult conversation with someone
you are not as connected to, or when the relationship is
under strain? What if you are a Manager that needs to have
a performance meeting with a person. Are you a salesperson
making cold calls or building relationships’ with
others.
How do you build and maintain rapport
with people who you need to network with?
Rapport is not chatting about the weather,
or simply matching body language. Rapport is a complicated
and advanced skill of communicating. Rapport is about matching
a person whole style in how they communicate, to enable
you to connect fully and ultimately so that they feel understood.
When you pay attention to people who are in rapport they
generally adopt a similar posture, gestures and move in
a similar way. You may like to notice this next time you
are in rapport with someone. Notice, how your behaviour
is similar to theirs, your postures? When people are deeply
in rapport they will be matching posture, movement and gestures,
breathing levels, voice tone and language.
Rapport is essential for any meaningful communication to
take place. What do you do if rapport doesn’t naturally
occur within the relationship? What do you do if it is not
returned by the person you are dealing with?
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Respect the other person’s beliefs, values and
styles of relating even though they are different to
yours. |
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Noticing the que's that indicate that you are not
in rapport with the person, such as different posture,
expression, breathing, movement, voice tone and pace,
language use, i.e. Whether using visual, auditory or
feeling patterns of language. |
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When you are rapport you will know it, you will feel at
ease with the conversation and when you move the other person
will move. It is like a dance, where it is not easy to tell
who is leading and who is following. You will understand
the other person’s perspective without having to agree
with it.
